“How’s your day going today?”

I flatly lied: “It’s going well.”

I guess it was kinda going well. I had ran across town, finishing up errands (starting a new bank account, figuring out why my gate key wasn’t working, picking up Paul, Charlie, and John).

But no matter how many things I cross off my list (and by the way, it’s actually good motivator in the mornings… leave something really trivial to finish for the next morning when you wake up… and man, it’ll help you start your day!), I couldn’t shake the fact that I am, still indeed, proud.

I’m so proud, in fact, that I’m proud of my pride. See what I just did in the last paragraph? I just indirectly told you how much I am the humblest man in the world.

Patronizing words come from this mindset. I cannot shake it. I can’t just cross this weakness off my list.

But daily faithfulness… daily prayer… as iron sharpen iron… I kinda had to jump around Proverbs for this verse, but still, it’s quality. This leads me to how I need to keep seeking out those brothers and sisters more mature in the faith. It’s not that they have the answers to all my questions, but that they can show me the road to God…

Aw, snap. It’s time to work some more. Only a few hours left before I sleep…

Going through proverbs has been amazing. More about wisdom… and how much I need to respect and fear God which comes naturally with humility.

I get quite frustrated at my faults. I don’t like how “sin” can be something I can cross off my list of things. No matter how many times I cross it off, it seems like the line either disappears or I wasn’t using a thick enough pen. It discourages me… it makes me want to get a thicker pen.

But you see, as long as we fight… but I feel like I’m not fighting enough… my hearts in it, but I’m just not going the extra mile.

It seems like when the storm hits, I feel happy. For some reason, I’m hanging onto the Word a lot stronger than before… and I don’t run away from the problems as much. Rather than thinking back to only those sermons and small group Bible studies and random talks with people and my own understanding, I’m going to the Source of it all.

Need to keep fighting. Need to keep searching. Need to keep growing.

Even though it seems like the journey is like a bazillion miles long. The wait, the goal, even the journey, is well worth it.